The Best Medicine is Great Girlfriends

Last weekend I went down to St. George with a few girlfriends. What a blast we had!! I've never been one to take time out for myself and head out of town with just the girls, but Oh my Gosh!! It is just what the doctor ordered!!

It was so nice just to lay out by the pool for 3 days, read (well sortof), shop, laugh, and laugh some more, eat out, and smile when we heard kids crying and got to joyfully lay back in our chairs knowing they weren't our kids! There were moments I felt as if I was a crazy high school girl again, and then there were moments that I was so happy to be who I am at this time in my life and the experiences I've had that have gotten me this far. It's amazing how a bunch of friends can bring out the best, the wildest, the crazy and fun sides out in you as well as help you remember who you are as a mother, wife, church member, and friend.

I am SO GRATEFUL for my girlfriends. Not very many times in my life have I felt such a NEED for them. As I get older and am in the heart of raising my kids, I realize how much I VALUE my friends, how much I LOVE them, and how GRATEFUL I am for their wisdom and life experiences. I hope in 30 years from now, we will still have the opportunity to laugh, act like high school girls, lay out by the pool and spend a little time away... just the girls.

Avery's Funny Sleep Positions

Avery got a new toddler bed and I think she has enjoyed her new found freedom. In a matter of a few days, I found her in several different spots sound asleep. I think she just played and played until she couldn't take it anymore. One place I found her a couple different times was right behind her bedroom door. I wish I could have found a way to get into her room to take those pictures.

Follow up on Avery's Artwork

So, as you all saw, Avery did beautiful artwork on my couches. The video didn't do it justice. It was a lot worse than it looked. Not to mention it was Red, Blue and Green PERMANENT marker! My brother used to work for Chem Dry, so when it happened, I called him and he said that I'd probably make it worse if I tried to fix it myself so just call someone to get it out... so $120 later, I now have a semi clean couch. They could get the green and red out, but for some reason, the blue wouldn't come out. It's faded a ton, but you can still see it. That's one expensive piece of artwork! One thing I forgot to mention, when I saw the marker, I went over to the couch and gasped (of course). Then I started calling for Avery. I think she knew she wasn't supposed to do that because she was hiding under our kitchen table not making a sound! It was pretty funny actually. The best thing about it is that Kaden ratted her out. Kaden found her and said, "MOM, she's under the table!" (So much for having a protective brother!)

So, I've decided to start a "destruction" list of all the things AVery gets into. Just last week she drew on my couch (as you all saw), rolled out two different rolls of toilet paper all over the house, got into a bag of tiny rocks that were supposed to go in her fish tank and "played" in them all over her carpet, spilled a box of Cheerios, and dumped out a whole container of conditioner in the bathtub for "bubbles". She's just so curious right now. Good thing she is so cute!

We'll see what next week brings.

This needs no explanation

Funny Kids

Avery is quite the "accesory" type of gal. She is totally into shoes, earrings, nail polish, bags, jackets and hats. She's the girl my mom always wished I would have been.
Anyway... this is Avery the other day. She insisted on wearing her backpack, jacket and shoes (even though you can't see them) as she ate breakfast. The funny thing is that she still has her jammies on underneath all this! What a girl!! I think I'm going to have my hands full with this one!

This is Kaden during his "nap". I came in to check on him and found the bed torn apart and him lying inclined on his bed. It's amazing what kids come up with when they have some time to themselves without the TV on. I just thought it was funny that he went to all this work to tear his bed apart, and then still fell asleep. Kids are too darn funny.

Brighton's Baby Blessing

Brian did a great job on the baby blessing. It was such a wonderful day as we spent most of it with family and friends. Bright is a special little boy and we feel so blessed to have him with us. He is starting to smile so much and it makes our day! Even the kids run over to watch him when he's smiling!
After the blessing at church, we all came back here for lunch. Thank you everyone who brought yummy treats! It was a fun afternoon and even cooler that my family stuck around and cleaned up for me! I gotta love my mom! She's always there for me.

Thanks

Yeah! I figured it out!!! Thank you everyone for your great tips.

HELP!!!

For those of you who think it's so easy to change your backgrounds.... I need your help. I can't figure it out. I can get into the HTML and I think I know where to change the code, but it's not working. What am I doing wrong?
Call Me!!! Write Me, Email Me... Anything! I need major help. It's driving me crazy.

WEAR GREEN

EPIPHANY (warning.. it's deep)

Today I had an unexpected epiphany, in the most unexpected places....
For months now, I have been wanting to try out a new Yoga/Tai-Chi class at the gym. I had taken a class years ago in college, but nothing since then, so... I am VERY MUCH a beginner. (Downward Dog made my legs shake, that's how new I am to this stuff)

Anyway, the class was amazing. Not only did I feel rejuvenated and relaxed after the hour barefoot in a dimmed room, I actually had a spiritual experience. Now, I've heard that yoga does do that to some people, but never really believed it... until today.
So I am in the class, trying very hard to focus on the moves as well as clearing my mind of the daily grind that often floods all parts of my brain. The instructor has us go to the "salute to the sun" position. As I did it.... my epiphany hits me like a ton of bricks. As I stood there, void of stresses in my life reaching up toward the ceiling, I felt this overwhelming love from my Father in Heaven. I felt as if there was no ceiling at all and I was truly giving myself to God, talking with Him, and LETTING GO of the need to do things on my own. I found myself no longer void of thought, but giving thanks for all that I have. I felt as though for just a moment, as I posed in "salute to the sun" that it was not the sun I was saluting, but Heavenly Father. Saluting HIM who has given me so much, I realized I do not allow He who knows me best to help me in my life as much as I should. I go on day to day very independent. Not wanting the help from others... even my husband at times. I am strong willed, I like to be in control, and like to have things my way. (I've often been told I have a "big wall" around me in which it's difficult to break through.) I have gotten used to this way of life, and have in many ways forgotten how to "humble myself to the Lord".
Now as I had my head held high and arms "Saluting My God", I realized that in so many instances in life, we are either looking , straight ahead of us with the things we have to get done, or we are looking down, discouraged or tired from a long day. But how often are we looking UP? How often do we take the time to stop, breath, raise our head and arms and "salute" HE who has given us everything. HE who can heal our pain. HE who can allow us joy and HE who is there to help and guide us? When I look straight ahead or when I look down, I realize I usually forget to look UP. UP to HIM who is there for me. In reality, that is the ONLY direction my head should be... the other things fall in place on their own after that.
Wow... all that from one yoga pose... So I guess now I must say that, YES... yoga can be somewhat of a "spiritual journey". At least it was today. Much like anything I guess; when you allow your self to get rid of the daily "noise" that fills our heads and just let go. It is then that TRUTH and HUMILITY can fill your soul.

The Death of Me!!

Well, I'm back from a week long hiatus. I slacked off last week trying to get my life back in order after a week long hospital stay with Brighton. Now that I'm back, I'm blogging about my BIGGEST spring time weakness... I love spring time because it's finally getting warm. It's beautiful outside and the stores stock their shelves with Cadbury Mini Eggs. Oh my gosh!!! These little devils are the death of me!! I could eat a whole bag in a day if I'd let myself. I've gained 6 pounds in the last two and half weeks (only part of that can be blamed on eating crappy while Brighton was in the hospital) the other part is entirely because of these sinfully delicious little eggs. Man just talking about them makes me want to run to my pantry. Once this bag is gone... no more for me! (we'll see how long that motivation lasts)
Best be off to the gym.

We're Home!

After 6 days at Primary Children's, we're finally home. Brighton finally handled being off oxygen on Sunday. After they monitered him for 24 hours to see if he could keep his levels up we were free to come home.
I am so happy we have doctors and nurses that know what they are doing and can take care of our loved ones when we can't do it ourselves. As bad as I felt that he had to be in the hospital, he couldn't have been in a better place. Everyone there was just wonderful. We are so blessed to have him home and that he's feeling better. Now that he's home, I might be going a little crazy because they want us to stay at home for the next 2-3 weeks, but oh well... at least I've got my blogging friends. You guys will all be my social life for a while (I guess that's not much different from now anyway) :)

Thank you all for your concern and love for us. Especially mine and Brian's parents. We couldn't have done any of this without you guys. Wow... it's sure a blessing to have great family who can come to your aid in a seconds notice. We love you guys.

3:30 AM

The title of this post says it all, but since I'm here, I will give an update.
It's now Sunday afternoon. We've been here since Tuesday. I've decided Brighton just likes this 5 star resort a little too much to want to come home yet.
He's stayed about the same the last day and a half. He's on a very small amount of oxygen now which is great, but he can't seem to wean off of that amount. He's great off the oxygen for a few hours, then he needs it again (bummer). He's also still has a quite a bit of mucas down in his chest and in his nose so they are still suctioning him every couple hours. In order for him to come home, he's got to be off oxygen for 12 hours and not have to have a deep suction for 24 hours. So as of right now, he's still on oxygen and he's already been suctioned 3 times today... so odds are we're here another day or two.
Luckily, he is feeling much better though. He is awake and alert a lot more (even at 3 am :) as you can see above). He's even started smiling a little bit! He hasn't really done that yet, so it's fun to see him reach that milestone in his life. He's so much better than he was a few days ago so luckily the hard part is over.
Thank you all for thinking about us and praying for us. It's so comforting to know we've got such great friends and family watching over us!
Love you all. I'll keep you all updated.

Our Little Doctors

Kaden and Avery have been little troopers since Brighton's had my one on one attention up here. For the most part, they have been doing well. It broke my heart last night when Kaden called me on the phone and said, "Mommy, when are you coming home forever?"
There is just so much a 4 year old can understand, you know? The staff here at Primaries have been so great! We have had amazing nurses that have gone out of their way to make sure we understand everything that's going on. They have done all this for our kids too. Last Friday was the first time the kids came up. They have a program here where they teach the siblings about the hospital and what is going on with their little brother. They give them dolls and let them play "doctor". The lady helping them gives them a doctor bag with all the different wires and stickers that are on Brighton so when they see him, it won't look as scary. The kids are then able to put on the different wires on their dolls. They are also able to play with other tools doctors use to make their brother feel better. It was so neat to see them interact with their dolls. I was so impressed with the staff here and their thoughfullness in making sure the siblings feel comfortable.
So now Kaden and Avery have been up here a couple times and they love playing doctor. Kaden gives us all shots and medicine. Avery... well, she just likes to play peek a boo in the curtains. She's the "playful" nurse that keeps everyone happy. Those are very much needed around here, so I guess Avery does a great job!
I'm so proud of these little guys. It's hard to be moved around and away from your parents. They are so great. I am a very lucky mom to have all these great kids.

Things are looking up

Brighton got moved out of the intensive care yesterday afternoon!! YEAH!!!!
We are now up in the pediatric unit here at primary children's hospital. Yesterday was a great day for Brighton. He continues to do better with his breathing. He got off the heavy duty oxygen (high flow) yesterday morning and they put him on the normal oxygen. Once he could handle that, they moved him up to where he is now. Now today, they've decreased the oxygen support even more and took his feeding tube out!! Now is the fun job of trying to get him to nurse again after 4 days! He's doing pretty well with it though.
Speaking of nursing, this has been one of those things that has kept me laughing up here. I honestly feel like a cow going in to get milked. Since he's been on a feeding tube, I haven't been able to nurse him, so I've had to pump. They have these "pumping rooms" here at the hospital. You go in with your bag of parts, sit in a booth, close the curtain and hook yourself up to your milking machine. (mooooooo) j/k It makes me laugh, but I'm glad they've got a place to do that... it's just funny. Luckily there are things that can make you look on the bright side right?
I am so happy he's doing better. It was a couple pretty rough days for him and just yesterday everything started to improve. It's amazing how fast they can get sick and how fast they can start feeling better as well. Let's just pray he continues to do better so we can get home soon.

Life in the NICU

Brighton is doing a little better today! They were able to lower his oxygen amounts for most of the day yesterday which is great. Yesterday they put a feeding tube in him so he's getting some nutrition, but he's really hungry. When I hold him he's a little upset for a while because I think he "smells" me. Luckily he calms down so we can cuddle for a while. The best news we've had so far is that the respiratory therapist came in and took him off the high powered oxygen about an hour ago and now he's just on normal oxygen. If he can stay stabilized on that, then he'll get out of the NICU in a few hours and onto the normal floor! YEAH! We're thinking he's on the up hill side of this nasty virus now!

He's a tropper. We just love this guy so much!

Eventful Afternoon

What a day!
I first want to start off by saying, Everything is fine. But, I do have a story to tell.
I am sitting in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU) at the Primary Children's Hospital here in Salt Lake City where we've been for the past 24 hours now. Brighton caught the nasty RSV and had to be hospitalized for the next several days. Not fun for our little guy that's for sure! I'll give you a rundown on how this all came about.
Yesterday afternoon I went in to our pediatrician for Avery's 2 year check up. While we were in the office, I just mentioned to the nurse that I was a little concerned about Brighton because he hadn't been eating very well and he wasn't having a lot of wet diapers. (He has had a cold the last couple days along with a nasty little cough, but everyone has a cold right now so I hadn't been too concerned. I mostly just wanted to know the best way to hydrate him when he didn't have a desire to eat much.)
Anyway, so the nurse thought it would be a good idea to check his weight and listen to his chest. I got him undressed and when the doctor came in, she listened to his chest and immediatly said he sounded like he had RSV, but she wanted to do some tests to make sure. RSV isn't a huge deal for older kids, but since Bright's only 5 weeks old, it's a little more serious. So, they took Brighton in the other room to do some tests while the doctor finished up Avery's well care visit. (Here's where it gets interesting). So Avery was checked off with a clean bill of health, and then she got the dredded shots. She was a trouper though! As I was cuddling her after her little pokes, they brought Brighton back in and started checking his oxygen levels because he was taking some pretty deep breaths. Well, to make a long story a little shorter, he wasn't breathing well. He was way below what was normal so the doctor started talking to me as calmly as she could and explained that his oxygen levels were not very good and that he'd need to go to the primary childrens hospital and they had already called an ambulance to take him up there. I was in shock! I had just brought Avery up so they could tell us how healthy she was and I was leaving in an ambulance with a different kid! Ahhhhh!! Luckily Brian's mom works minutes away from the doc's office, so I hurried and drove Kaden and Avery over there and I rushed back to the doctors just in time to see my little guy strapped on a stretcher in his car seat and oxygen blowing in his mouth. OH MY GOSH!! He looked so tiny and helpless. I think I was in too much shock to cry. So off we went into the fire truck... lights and sirens in all.
So here we are a day later. He still can't get enough oxygen on his own so he's got oxygen helping him breath. He's got a feeding tube in his nose and all sorts of other wires attached to him in various places. He goes through good and bad moments, but for the most part he sleeps through it all.
I am so grateful to have a hospital like this one here and available to us. As scary as it is to see your little guy hooked up to tubes and need help breathing, it's nothing in comparison to what most of these kids are going through up here. I feel truly blessed that our "adventure" in the NICU is only for a few short days and that he will come back home healthy and happy. I think that's a luxury alot of these other mom's don't get to have.
We'll keep everyone posted. I'll posts some pictures tomorrow.

I'm "Cheww"!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AVERY!!!




Today was Avery's birthday and we had such a fun weekend. I can't believe my little girl is two years old. It seems like just yesterday she was this tiny 5 lb baby with loads of hair. She's still got loads of hair, but oh how she's grown. It's been an awesome couple years with her. She ALWAYS keeps us on our toes, as well as keeps us laughing with her fun personality. I often am calling her a "monster" or a "crazy child", but I wouldn't have her any other way. She is a free spirit with a loving personality. I adore her with all my heart. I am in awe with how much she has learned. She is talking so much right now. As the title of this blog says, "I'm Cheww!" I wish you could hear her say it, it's so cute! She's been very proud to be 2 years old.
We had a great party with her grandparents on Saturday night. Avery is obsessed with "Shishees" (fish) right now, so Brian bought her an aquarium for her bedroom. She also got a "shishee cake". I think the high light of the party was her little bike and the indoor trampoline... (I know.. what in the world was I thinking when I bought that?) Kaden was just as excited about that as she was. When she opened it he said, "Look Avery, it's a present for both of us!"
We love our little Avers. She brings out the "girl" in me. I treasure the moments when I get to spend time with just her reading books or cuddling in my bed before the day actually begins. She's our little "bug" are we are completely in love with our precious "wild child".

Tagged

If I tagged you here's what you do. Post the words in all caps below and fill in info about yourself. Then, at the end you tell who you are tagging & go and tag 5 friends on their blogs. It's just a way to get to know fun little things about people.

TEN YEARS AGO......
I had been home from my mission a few months and I was going to the University of Utah majoring in Speech Pathology. My social life was at the LDS Institute where I was in their show choir "Encore". (Yes... I was once part of a "sparkly vest club", Brian and I had just broken up (Super Bowl Sunday) after many years of being together. It sucked, but had to be done so I could realize how great he really was. So, I was dating around, going to school, working at Murdock Travel in the accounting department. I went to Europe with a girlfriend, got my passport stolen (story for another day) and got back together with Brian 8 months after we broke up (Yeah!)

FIVE PLACES I HAVE LIVED.....
Idaho, Tennessee, Utah, Oregon, Arizona

FIVE THINGS ON MY TO DO LIST......
Finish a wedding cake, deliver a wedding cake at 4:00, clean my house, go get more diapers, get dressed!

I ENJOY.....
Hanging out with my kids and laughing at the funny things they do, going on dates with Brian, blogging, reading (that's a new one for me!), sitting in a bubble bath, pedicures, hiking, boating, going on vacations, 1000 thread count sheets

THREE BAD HABITS.....
Leaving diapers on the floor (I know it's gross... I always get distracted), eating too many sweets, biting my fingernails

FIVE THINGS YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW ABOUT ME.....
Used to be a "Theatre" major in college, Have a wedding cake business, I once waterskiied from Bullfrog marina to Rainbow Bridge at Lake Powell, I used to be a major tom boy (my "Martha Stewart" personality only surfaced about 6 years ago) and I love to do things for other people (got that from my parents... thank you guys)

FIVE JOBS THAT I HAVE HAD.....
Lion House as a cook & hostess, worked in a tech lab in college, Murdock & Starbird Travel, Jordan Valley School, and of course being a mom (this one's the best for sure!)

What will be going on in 10 years
Now this is a scary one. I have a hard time thinking my kids going to be going to kindergarten soon, let alone that he will be the yucky age of 14!! Oh the joys of puberty. Avery will be 12 and starting Young Women (Ahhhhhh!!!!) and Brighton will be 10. Oh my gosh.. this frieks me out even typing it. As for me, I hope to finally be at my goal weight, have run a marathon, and have a fully functioning kitchen in my basement for my cakes. Brian and I will have gone to Europe (if all plans are on schedule) and hopefully have purchased a time share somewhere. I'll be in my 40's and I pray we all have good health. Wow... a little wierd to think about this. We should all put this one in a time capsule and open it together in 10 years to see what really happened.

So there you have it. A little bit about me. So I tag......
Jenni, Jesse, Annie, Kristy, Crystal, Heidi, Megan and Amber (Anyone else who wants to join in the fun)

A Valentine to You

My Best Friend

With it being valentines day and all, I thought I'd pay tribute for a second to my very own "valentine" (ahhhh, cheezy).
We were with some friends this weekend and after we got home, Brian said to me, "You can tell Jon and Emily are best friends". I thought about what an awesome compliment that was and it made me reflect on our own relationship over the past 15 years we've been together.
We started out as friends and I truly believe that is what kept our relationship from not falling apart. Brian has a great sense of adventure as many of you know, and he introduced me to so many things that have now become a huge part of who I am. So many of our dates were hiking up in the mountains. When you've got a couple hours just walking in the beautiful wasatch, there's not much to do besides talk (and make out every once in a while too!). We spent so much time talking about everything we could think of. I really think he's got me figured out more than I have myself figured out and it probably stems back to all the times we were alone together in the mountains.
Aside from our love for hiking, we also did so many other fun things that helped us become best friends. We always tried to be creative in our dating. Dinner and a movie were fun every once in a while, but bungee jumping, boating, skiing, and countless school dances were even better. There were times we'd just make some treats and take them to our relatives who were alone. It was moments like these that I knew he was the best friend I had ever had.
As time passed by, there were very few days we didn't see each other or talk on the phone. We survived going to seperate high schools, seperate colleges and even two missions. There was a time after our missions that we broke up for a few months and I think it was then that I realized how much his friendship meant to me.. He had been my best friend for so many years, and when we broke up, it was him that I felt I needed to go to for a shoulder to cry on, but I couldn't. I had no one to talk to.. It was hard few months but crucial for me. I finally realized what a priceless individual he was and how lucky I had been to have such a good man in my life. Once I realized that, we were married shortly after.
We have had so much fun together, worked hard and struggled together, and have had children together. I can't imagine my life without him and thank God each day that I am married to such a patient, understanding, selfless man.
When I look back at all the "fun and adventurous" things we've done, it makes me realize that those are the things that can keep our relationship at it's highest potential. But I also realize that when reality kicks in, the fun and adventurous side of me is put on the back burner and I don't make it a priority.. I appreciate moments like Valentines day, or seeing examples of friends who remind me how important it is to have a loving "friendship" with your spouse. Brian is my very best friend. I love him so much, and I could only hope that when people see us together, they too could look at us and say, "you can sure tell they are best friends" It's that type of relationship that will carry us through, so that in 30 years when all the kids are out of the house, we will have things to talk about, enjoy the silence, and cherish that we still can enjoy cuddling on the couch together... maybe still enjoy a little make out session in the canyons!
I love you Brian. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.
Happy Valentines Day.

ROCK ON!!

So we were in the car going to Brian's parents house tonight and Kaden said, "Mom, do you know what this means?" (as he holds his hand up and shows me the rock on sign) Here's how our conversation then preceded to go:

Mom: "I don't know what it means?"
Kaden: "It means Rock On!"
Brian: "What does Rock On mean Kade?"
Kaden: "It means when someone says something to you, you hold your hand up like this
and say "Rock On!"

(At this point there is a lull in the conversation for a minute)

Kaden: Hey mom... I can even do it!
Mom: "Do what Kade?"
Kaden: "Rock On.... See?"
(I look back to see him rocking back and forth in the back seat)
Soon enough Kaden and Avery were both in the back seat "rocking on"!!!

SOOOOO FUNNY!!! I LOVE THE THINGS KIDS COME UP WITH!!

Creative Time

Since Brighton has been born, we haven't gotten out much.. This has led to many a creative moments at home!! We've had fun doing all sorts of great stuff. Reading books, watching movies, coloring pictures were fun for a while, but started getting the "been there done that" attitude. So we decided to spice it up a little bit! From "Shaving Cream Art" to homemade mini golf in our family room... we've had lots of fun the last few weeks.

Brighton 3 Weeks Old

Here's our little guy. He's getting bigger each day. He's also more alert when he's awake which is fun.
I may not be the best mom for saying this, but I really think babies are the most
UN-photogenic beings on this earth. It is next to impossible to get a picture that is truly photo worthy until they are a few months old. But for posterity sake, I've got to have a few of him now while he still has the zombie stare most of the time. So here he is...so cute while I was taking these pictures, but none of them turned out as cute as he really looked. Oh well... the joys of newborns.
He's still pretty adorable, even if the pictures don't prove it!

Identity Crisis

So as you can see, we've got a little bit of an identity crisis going on at our home right now.
As you can see beautiful little Avery in her very "girly" dress looked so cute on Sunday. When we got home from church, she turned into Lara Croft... She was running around the house going "boom, boom, boom" and chasing Brian and Kaden with a gun!! (Just when you think they are going to be so petite and feminine)


Now for Kaden...
Here's the thing. I don't usually enjoy painting my sons fingernails, but Avery was getting her weekly manicure (see... she's really girly most of the time). And Kaden came in and said, "I sure wish my fingers were red". I tried to explain that only girls got their fingernails painted but he continued to tell me how much he loved red. So we decided to give it a shot. So there we were... Kaden sitting on the table, me painting MY SONS fingernails and toe nails (Oh dear)... As he was about done, I told him he couldn't touch anything because his fingers were still wet. The first thing he said, "But mom... how will I push my dump truck?"
At least I know he's still mostly boy. Infact, after he had the nail polish on for a few hours I think he realized it wasn't all that cool and he wanted it taken off! Thank goodness!!!

Jack Johnson

OK... so I know I just posted a somewhat lengthy thought on how much I love my family... but on a more worldly note.
Does anyone else think Jack Johnson is a babe? I was just watching a video on him from this "green" newsletter I get and my gosh he's hot.

(Of course, not as hot as Brian :) .. love ya best!!)

Gratitude

This post is mostly for me... a way to express my feelings so I won't forget them. You know... what I should use my journal for but then I'd have to dust it off!! Sooo... it's a long one.... you don't have to keep reading if you don't want to!

I've been feeling so much gratitude for the chance to be a new mom lately. I'm sure I felt this way with the other two, but for some reason it feels different with Brighton. Not that I love him more, but I think it's because I finally know what to expect. With Kaden I was a new mom.... terrified of how to take care of a new baby and how to "share" my love between Brian and a child. We had been married 5 years before we had Kaden and had dated several years before that. We had never had to share eachother before. As soon as he came, we loved him immediatly, but it was still unknown territory. A lot had to be learned.
Then with Avery.. I was once again worried about loving her as much as I did Kaden. I had almost 2 1/2 years to have all the one on one time I wanted with Kaden and I was afraid I wouldn't be as good as a mom when there was another one in the picture. Soon I found out that once again I didn't have to split my love between 3 people now... somehow my love just grew. It's true Avery hasn't gotten as much one on one time as Kaden did, but it hasn't really mattered. She still feels just as loved and magically I'm able to give them each personal time when they need it.
When I became pregnant with Brighton, it was a big shock. With Kaden we had to do fertility drugs, with Avery... it took nearly 2 years, and with Brighton... well... Suprise!!! Needless to say, I was too shocked to be happy about it for a while. I like things planned out and on my terms (I'm learning that isn't the way Heavenly Father does things.. I know, I'm slow) So it took me several months to get excited about having another child. How was I going to handle 3 kids? But then he came. I knew (from experience) that I would love this kid as much as my other kids, and that somehow this new little baby would even make me love my other kids and my husband even more.... (again... the love grows, it's never divided). I find myself in awe with the amount of love I have for this little guy. I treasure the moments when it's quiet in the house and I just sit and cuddle with him. My heart melts when he stares up at me or when he turns his head to the sound of my voice. What is it about a newborn that makes you obsessed with kissing them? We don't go around kissing other people a thousand times a minute! But when I'm holding him, I can't help but kiss his little head, hold his hand, or just stare. I am truly in awe by this tiny little guy and that I'm blessed enough to be his mother.
Then I look at my other two kids. I notice Kaden and his ability to keep Avery entertained when I can't. I don't ask him to, and he doesn't even know he's doing it, but it's as if he KNOWS that I need the help. I watch him coloring or playing with his cars or listening to his stories and am blown away that he's growing up. It wasn't too long ago that it was him in my arms. He is one of the kindest, compassionate, sincere people I have ever met and he's only 4 years old. I learn alot from him each day.
Then there is Avery. For the first time in her life, she's actually wanting a little more of my attention. She's always had a more independant personality I'm sure she gets from me (her stubborness also comes from me as well). But lately she'll come up on the couch and cuddle while I read her a book, or she'll crawl in bed with me and just hang out for a few minutes. She too is growing up and it's as if I can see her personality develop like I'm watching a story unfold on a movie screen. She has this love for life and a determination about her that I know she will succeed. Yet, she has this loving and kind side about her that you can just tell that she cares about people. I don't know how many times I hear her say "a baby go?" and runs in my room to check to see if Brighton is alright. Then she'll say "baby nite nite". As much as I complain about her endless energy and personality... the truth is... she is an incredible little girl full of life and is always making us smile and laugh... isn't that what we wish we could be like to other people?
And last but not least, there's Brian. The one and only man who has ever had enough patience with me (except my own dad) to stick around. Some how he "gets" me.... often better than I "get" myself. I watch him be a dad and it makes me do a couple things... The first and most important is that I fall in love with him more and more each time he's wrestling on the floor with 2 kids jumping all over him (even if he's exhausted he still finds the energy to play) or when he's doing anything at all with the kids. From cuddling Brighton to launching rockets with Kaden and even trying to do Avery's hair so she looks "cute". He's the best. And I love him more and more with each act he does for and with his children. The second is because of the first reason. It's just that when I watch him with the kids, it makes me realize the importance of taking time out to "play". I've learned that from him and admire it so much. Who cares if the dishes aren't done in the sink and Kaden asks to play trains. What is more important? What does it matter if I answer my emails(or even post a message on my blog) now or wait until Avery has finished sitting on my lap while she looks at the family photos on our computer. Emails and blogs can wait... but she might not. As I'm seeing- they grow up so fast and soon the precious moments of her WANTING to sit on my lap will be gone. That's what I've learned from watching Brian... he always puts us first. And I love him even more because of it.
And last of all, I guess I've even learned a lot about myself. I've learned how much I love being a mom. I've learned that I have the power to control the feelings (for the most part) that are in my home. I also have to power to be the best I can be. I may not feel I'm doing enough... but if I remind myself that I'm doing my best, that will be enough. There are so many times I feel I need to do more, give them more of my time, teach and play with them more often, but the truth is... I'm at least doing it. Maybe not as much as I'd like to, but I am doing it and my kids aren't deprived. They know I love them and they are happy. Is there really anything else they need? Is all the other stuff really for them or is it just a way to help me feel better about my abilities as a mom? I don't know. But I DO know that it's a pretty great job most of the time and I think that most of us moms (and FOR SURE ALL OF YOU MOMS READING MY BLOG) are pretty darn good at what we do. We love our kids, we give them what they need and for the most part we really enjoy it. So this is a big THANK YOU for all you great moms out there that are learning and enjoying and loving your little ones every day just like I am. Keep up the great work and know that I am inspired by all of you as well. We can always learn so much from eachother!

A Great Tribute

I was so touched by this tribute to President Hinckley from Glenn Beck. My brother in law found it on you tube and I was so impressed by the words that were shared for all of the world to hear.
Even in his passing, I am even more amazed and inspired by the character of our prophet. I hope we can all have even a pinch of his character in our own lives. Hope you like the video.

**** OK... so I don't know how to add a you tube video right onto my blog... so just ckick on "A Great Tribute" (the title of this post) and it will connect you to the video that way. wierd.****


hope this works

Who fits better? Avery or Brighton???

It's a little hard to decide who fits better in this swing... Avery- way to big, but Brighton? he fell over the other day and I found him at the base of the swing. I guess he's a little too small. Pretty cute all the same.

Avery has reverted back to a baby and she thinks she's pretty funny!!
She never took a pacifier while she was little, but now she walks around with one in her mouth and giggles. She also loves to sit in Brighton's swing. If she wasn't so darn cute, I would have to get mad at her, but I just can't bring myself to tell her she's too big to sit in it.







This is her newest look. Every time you tell her no to something, or if she's disgusted for some reason she glares at us like this. It makes me laugh everytime! It's like she's trying to prove that she's tough... but just can't quite pull it off.
All I can say is that two year olds always keep you entertained.

Somthing to talk about other than the baby!

So all of the posts I've made in the last two weeks (I know... there haven't been hardly any) have been about the baby. Sooooo... I thought I'd post some fun pictures of us going sledding yesterday. The kids love to get out of the house these days (I can't imagine why - hee, hee)
So we took them sledding for a little while and had a lot of fun. Kaden is becoming quite the "snow a holic" thanks to his dad. Because he goes skiing about every week, he's very comfortable playing in the snow. It was fun to watch him go down on the sled and just laugh when he would tumble out. Avery probably would have had more fun if she wasn't so tired, but we got her to go down a couple times at least.
Hope you all get to go sledding at least once this year... it's a nice way to get out and enjoy the snow!! And from the looks of the weather reports... I think we'll be getting plenty more of the white stuff in the next 2 weeks, so GO OUT AND HAVE FUN!!

These are a few of Favorite Things (I had forgotten about until I had another baby)

* Babies SOFT skin
* How your child holds onto your FINGER while you feed him
* The way they TURN when they hear your voice
* How they form to your BODY when you hold them
* The PEACE and HAPPINESS everyone feels when they are around
* Johnsons & Johnsons BABY LOTION
* Cute PREEMIE diapers
* When they open their eyes and STARE at the lights around them
* Sleeping
* Sleeping on my STOMACH
* Soft CUDDLY Blankets to wrap them in
* Swaddling (they looks so tight and comfy when swaddled)
* Their LITTLE cry
* Their ticked off... feed me now cry (OK.. maybe I'm a bad mom, but it makes me laugh
when he gets so out of control that he's shaking.. just because it's been 2 whole
hours since he ate last)
* PUMPING.... Oh wait... that's on my "not so favorite things list"!
* The FEELING that comes from being a new mom... It makes me want to be BETTER
* New BABY clothes

Big Sister Avery

Avery is a great big sister despite the fact that she is 2 and highly emotional. She loves her little brother, but clings to mom and dad all day long. I feel bad for her because life as she knows it has changed, but thankfully, she adores Brighton and she has done some pretty cute things the last couple weeks as well. Here's just a few:
- "Baby Brite, Brite"
- She will run into the crib and just sit and watch him sleep
- When the baby is asleep, she'll come in and tell me, "brite brite night night. shhhh
(as she puts her finger over her mouth)
- She "gently" points to his various body parts. For ex.. "baby eyes, no, outh, ear,
hands, etc)
- She giggles when he wiggles his legs
- When she wants to hold him she runs to the antibacterial lotion, says "ands" and
washes her hands.
- She holds him for about 5 seconds, kisses him on the head and is off again
- If the baby is in the other room, she will come in and say, "baby go?"
- I found her the other day trying to pick him up from the swing
- Also found her trying to feed him raspberries
- If he is on the floor, she runs over and gets a diaper and baby wipes for him (even
if I'm not changing his diaper)
- If he's crying, she runs and finds a "bean bean" (binky)
- When she's tired of being cooped up in the house, she'll come to me and say "ride"

Big Brother Kaden

So Kaden has been a HUGE help the last two weeks. He loves his brother and wants to make sure he is happy and safe all the time. Some of the cute things he has done so far are as follows:
- He wants to cuddle with his brother
- He runs and tells me to hurry and feed him because he's hungry every time he starts
crying
- He makes sure he always has clean hands before he holds him
- He loves to look at his toes and say, "Oh, you are so cute"
- He'll hold Brighton and say, "You love me don't you?"
- Whenever we have visitors, he says to them, "do you want to see baby brighton?"
- He goes in and checks on him when he wakes up in the morning to make sure he is
still there. He'll say, "Mom.. Brighton's still in his crib"
- He laughs whenever Brighton decides to pee with his diaper off (boys will be boys)
- He's an amazing big brother to Brighton and Avery... he will keep Avery entertained
when I can't
- He let's Brighton hold his rocket ship
- He prays for Brighton every night and Thanks Heavenly Father that his baby brother is
here with us

IT'S A BOY!!!

What a Great Day!!

So as you can see, we had our little baby. What a remarkable day it was! I went into my appointment for my check up and I had progressed a little bit, but the doctor wanted to check the fluids around the baby. To make a long story short... Brighton's fluids were really low, so they decided to induce me on Friday instead of Monday.
We were at the hospital about an hour later. They induced me and I started feeling contractions about 7:30 pm. Harder contractions came by about 8:15, I started pushing at 8:30 and two pushes later, he was here! It was so much fun not knowing what he was going to be. The excitement of hearing "It's a Boy!" was exhilarating!
As with every child, he's already got his funny personality traits. He cry is a high pitch squeal. He sounds more like a kitten than a baby. He only screams for a second and then he's done. He loves to cuddle on my shoulder, and the tighter the swaddle, the better. Once he's out of his blankets, he has a fit!
Kaden is already an amazing big brother. He can't get enough of him. He was positive he was going to have a baby brother and he was right. From the moment he saw him at the hospital he can't get enough of holding him and getting excited every time he wiggles. When my parents left the hospital the night Brighton was born, Kaden said, "Heavenly Father gave me what I wanted". Then I guess he went back to their house and in his prayers thanked and blessed his baby Brighton. What a sweet heart. He is such a tender hearted little kid. Tonight, he kept going in to check on the baby in the bassinet. He'd come back in to tell me he just checked on the baby and "no one took the bassinet". He's one excited big brother! Avery still hasn't quite grasped that it's alive... she thinks he's more like a doll. But she does say "baby brite brite". It's pretty cute. I'm sure I'll have plenty of stories to share in the upcoming weeks about Avery doing something to the baby. It's for sure going to be an interesting adjustment time.
As for Brian and I, we're a little tired, but feel so blessed. So much has happened in our family the last 4 1/2 years. We've spent 1/2 of our married life now with kids and 1/2 of our married life without kids. It's hard to imagine those first almost 5 years we didn't have any of these little guys running around. What did we possible do? I feel so blessed to have 3 healthy kids. (A little overwhelmed... it's a little surreal.... but very blessed) They are all miracles and blow my mind every day with how they grow and learn and especially how they view life. It's those tiny little miracles that bring so much joy into my life. Today is one of those days it's pretty awesome to be a mom!

GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!

So, baby #3 is preparing to show up any time now. As many of you mom's know.. you get pretty ancy by the the few weeks.
Last week I was dilated to almost a 4 and 70% effaced! I was thrilled thinking I'd have the baby any second.
Well..... it's still hasn't come. I wish the doctor never told me I was that far along because now I'm just getting impatient. I think that each moment could be "time". But to no avail. Hopefully I will have better news to post the next time I get on. We'll see how the next few days go. If you see me out jogging in the freezing cold the next little while, you'll know why!
If I do make it through the weekend, I'll be induced on Monday the 14th... so I guess if I have to I can be patient. (grrrrrrr... patience it's over rated)
Wish me luck! Three Kids... Ahhhhh!!!

Snow Gods... Looked Down Upon Us... FINALLY!!!

OK, OK... so I may be a little dramatic about the whole beard thing. At one point a few weeks ago Brian asked me if everyone knew whay he was still growing a beard because he was now starting to get comments from my friends husbands at church about when he was going to shave! Thanks all of you for sharing my blog with your spouses.. I found it quite humorous that he had to explain it to people!
Anyway... after several days of skiing without the "perfect powder" in the beard... Mr Snow God looked down upon us (or maybe it was just me) and gave us a storm that put most powder days to shame. Brian got the icicles in his nostrils, the snow stuck in his beard and that suffocating feeling of the powder in his face that he loves so much. Now I ask you... who's really the dramatic one? He seriously enjoys that!
Anyway... he called from the resort to tell me the beard could come off and he was generous to take a picture for me so I could show all of you the proof!! (What a sweet guy.. he takes a lot from me)
When he got home, he kept his promise... after a little "My name is Earl" action. Then shaved it off. He was instantantly ready to grow the beard back because he thinks he looks like a little kid without it, but I'm happy to have him clean shaven again. It's much easier to kiss. Even Avery is willing to kiss him again!
Thanks Bri for being such a good sport. I love you babe!

Christmas Time

I know I'm delayed in posting, but I'll give a quick recap...
Christmas was wonderful!! We had so much fun this year. The kids were a blast. Kaden was so into the "magic" of Christmas this year that it made it a blast. At my mom's house on Christmas Eve all the kids were "eating" (if you want to call it that) dinner. Since they weren't eating very well, Grandpa called Santa. Santa was put on speaker phone for all to hear. You should have seen those kids eat!!! As the phone call was coming to a close, Santa told them they had to eat at least 10 more bites, then said Merry Christmas and hung up. Well... the other kids must have forgotten the rule and got down from the table and went to play. Soon after, I realized that Kaden was sitting at the table all by himself. This is unusual for him because he's a TERRIBLE eater and he loves to play with his cousins. I told him he could go and play and he said, "But Santa said I have to eat 10 bites and I've only had 1" Oh my gosh!!! My heart melted! It was so cute. So there he was, all alone, trying to swallow down his food even though he really didn't want to. He sat there for a good 20 minutes until he finally got 10 bites down. What a cute kid!! I wish I would have taken a picture of him sitting there.
As for Christmas day... we had a great time as well. Cute Avery... unlike her brother LOVES to eat. I think she was more worried that she hadn't had breakfast than she was about getting presents. I got her a bowl of dry cereal and she would put it on her presents and eat it as she casually opened gifts. It was pretty funny.
The best part of Christmas for me is always our "Love Presents". To make a long story short... it started when I was a kid and my dad was out of work. We didn't have enough money to have a big Christmas so my parents came up with Love Presents. We had to make a hand made gift for each of our family members and then attach a "Love Note" or a letter of appreciation to each person. This has been a tradition we have continued to do for over 20 years now and we have continued it in our own little family. Kaden was so cute about his love gift to his dad. I had taken him to get some rockets that Brian and Kaden could build and blast off together. It was so precious to see Kaden Christmas morning. Here there is a huge spray of presents under the tree and he didn't even care about that. All he wanted to do was give his "Love Present" to his dad. I was so touched that at such a young age you could understand to love of giving.... especially to those you care about. His letter to his dad was simple but so sweet. I treasure it always. My kids continue to teach me about the real purposes of life every day. Their innocence and excitement are more profound than any book of literature that teaches us how to live sucessfully. I am so grateful for them.